Ready for a new day....

Had that today....

Ice massage....for 30 minutes. Along with heat therapy....ultrasound....and e-stem (electric pulse shock) treatment. Two hours worth of physical therapy for my jaw and shoulder. Left side of my jaw is back to being in a HUGE KNOT...even though I am using my jaw splint and bionator religiously. ***sigh***

So....since the therapy on my shoulder has not been working, I get to go through THIS again:








Appointment is on the 23rd. :( I hate cortisone shots. Granted....they WORK...just not very comfortable.


As far as the jaw goes....saw the TMJ doc today. He's not thrilled with how I was doing well...and now my mouth is getting "used" to the appliances, and is backsliding. He says they might have to make one or two different appliances. I guess that even with the night time appliance (bionator), I'm clenching so hard, they fear that I will bite right through the appliance. I had NO idea that a human could bite down SO HARD....DURING sleep.....all night long. I'm exhausted. Between the shoulder and me not sleeping (let ALONE through the night), my fibro is trying desperately to get the best of me. I'm back on Vicodin...much to my dismay.


My dad's not doing well. He's down to 112 pounds. I guess they are rapidly pushing him through the UCSF program to be seen by some GI specialsits. He has intestinal and lung issues that they can't seem to diagnose. He's withering away, and my heart is breaking. And, of course, I'm not dealing with it well. When someone close to me becomes deathly ill, I tend to get angry, and pull back....pretending like it's not going to happen. Which is a real bullshit approach. Doesn't get me anywhere. At least I know my issue. Just gotta deal with it.

Seems like there is a lot for me to deal with right now in my life. There's a lot I really DON'T want to face....and it's just right there IN my face...not leaving me alone. Good thing I'm pretty damned strong. I have to admit...I feel pretty beat up right now. I just hope I have the strength to get through the next few years....

By the way....Briana and Lee set a date: June 5th, 2010. So, I guess we will start planning soon. She's already starting a guest list. Has the place locked in. Wants to dress shop in March, I believe. I can't believe my baby is getting married....

I hope life treats her well.